A - Absolutely careless
B - Am I being disloyal?
C - Heading for a breakdown
D - I feel out of practice
E - I’m being fat-shamed
F - In the dark
G - Loveless relationship
H - Never-ending disagreement
1
I’ve been single for three years after a breakup with an abusive partner. I’ve recovered, and I’m very happy and open to a relationship. I’ve developed feelings for someone I see weekly; he’s the first person I’ve felt such a spark for in ages. He always compliments me when he sees me and seems decent, but he works almost non-stop and has little free time. Last week, we ended up kissing and fooling around, but I left before things got really heated. He said he might text me to meet up, but he didn’t, and when I saw him this week he was complimentary and flirtatious, but also distant. I’ve been single for so long; how do I turn something like this into a relationship?
2
I come from a large family and have five siblings. I am 19, female and going to university in September. The only person in my family who doesn’t make comments about my weight is my father. “Go and do this, it will burn calories,” “Oh, I thought you were pregnant,” “Watch what you’re eating, you’re getting big,” ”If you wear that you better suck in” ... You get the gist. I can’t take it any more. Only my sister knows that I suffered four years of bulimia because of similar comments in earlier years. I am just over two years free of this horrible disorder, and I’m scared I’m gradually turning back.
3
I am finding my wife’s driving increasingly alarming. We are both active and fairly independent people in our mid-60s. I’m sure I have slowed down as we have aged, but it seems as if she has speeded up. A trip with her at the wheel feels uncomfortable and erratic, bordering on the dangerous at times. She shows scant regard for speed limits and, after a journey in her car, I’m usually a nervous wreck. I’m also worried when she is out driving on her own. Any attempt to pass comment or discuss this simply meets with hostility, however I approach it. I am sure she would benefit from an advanced driving course, but we can’t even discuss it. We get on moderately well otherwise. What can I do?
4
My grandmother died some years ago. We were very close and loved one another very much. Her jewellery was divided among the grandchildren though I was given more than the others. It is not the sort I would wear, but I keep it as a memento of her and our relationship. I am now struggling to keep afloat financially, and feel sad that I can’t afford to buy nice things for my family and friends at Christmas. I know my grandmother always wanted me to be healthy, safe and happy, and any money raised would help in keeping me “safe” financially. But is it betraying her because she was so wonderful and is it an insult to her memory to sell these items?
5
My job is a low-paid, basic administrative role. My manager is going on maternity leave and although there is money to recruit a replacement, this will not happen and I will be given the majority of her tasks. My workload is already high but because I tend to work quickly, my manager expects that I should do every imaginable task in a short period of time. I recently stood up for myself and said I’d have to work at a slower pace if I’m expected to do a manager’s job on top of my own. Since speaking up, the atmosphere has been horrible and she is trying to catch me out over everything: accusing me of taking too much sick leave, which isn’t true, and denying me certain annual leave dates because they don’t suit her. I can feel myself getting sick from stress and desperately need advice so as not to mentally collapse.
6
I recently found out my husband has racked up a £10,000 credit card bill. He says it was spent on living expenses when we were short of cash. He has been the main wage earner since the birth of our first child five years ago. He admitted he would not have told me if I had not found out. If he had told me were in trouble financially we could have worked it out together – we’ve done so before – but he stuck his head in the sand. I am so angry and now my anger is turning to contempt. I can’t believe his stupidity. He is a good father and our children will be devastated if we split but I’m not sure I can remain married to someone I no longer trust or respect.
KEY:
1D 2E 3A 4B 5C 6F
